Shape may receive compensation when you click through and purchase from links contained on "Many people believe that living together beforehand can strengthen a marriage," says Anita Jose, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist at Montefiore Medical Center. Think of it as a foundation. When you are moving in together, your relationship should be as healthy as it has ever been. You would never attempt to build a skyscraper on a broken foundation. Just because you live together does not mean that you can't go out as a couple on date night. Studies consistently show that engaged couples who live together enjoy the same benefits-satisfaction, commitment, less conflict-as people who wait until marriage to move in. Ad Choices, 6 Ways Living Together Can Kill the Romance (and How You Can Totally Fix It). Same goes for him, though! Problem is, that's pretty tough to do. "But if they're engaged or planning a future-it doesn't have to be marriage-that tells you a ton about the couple." "More than 50 percent of couples that move in don't talk about what it means," says Stanley. While just dating and living solo, J and I made the extra effort to cuddle while watching TV, to go for a walk (hand-in-hand) after dinner or even to add that va-va-voom to what we were wearing (oh yes, him too). If your boyfriend constantly sees you in shapeless sweats, a mask and burping the alphabet you'll stop looking like the hot girlfriend he moved in with and, well, just his roomie. I'll say it: J is neat and I am a slob. There are 6 ways living together can kill the romance: 1. Here’s why moving in together can be a dicey thing and may even kill your relationship. The kinks of our mutual existence were already sorted out, which left us only to relish our wedded bliss. And, if you talk to the scientists who research cohabitation, we did it for the wrong reasons: I was tired of driving the twenty minutes to his place, my apartment building had bed bugs, and I'd save nearly a thousand bucks a month. If you have totally opposite perspectives, reconsider sharing an address, says Stanley. So how can you make sure you're one of the cohabiters that eventually becomes happily hitched? Since you technically see each other every day now, it's harder to remember to make that time together count for something. It's very possible to live together and keep the spark in your relationship, but there are six things to watch out for that can totally drain the romance if you let em. You could start taking each other for granted. Moving in with your partner might lead to a situation where you practically see him all day and night and no one else. People look down on them," says Stanley. "The reason [for living together] is actually pretty important," he emphasizes. You might be into each other’s face, which will lead to petty fights. Then ask your guy to do the same. will no longer be personal. It's not fair to HIM to have to keep picking up after me or to have to live in a messy apartment until I decide to clean up.